Tell HGF Things

This is the rise before the fall.

Soon you will be on my doorstep in the rain begging me with promises of swallowing to take you in.

And I wont.

That's right, I wont Sam. Then what, hmmm?

just watched sum pr0nz with the gf. was well lulz.

Ugh, I could never do that. She'd keep prodding my crotch to see if I was getting a boner, then sulk if I did.

In accordance with Megan's Law, everyone in a 5 mile area knows the type of porn I watch.

and the problem is?

crying chicks always make it hotter anyways.

Who's Megan? And, how does everyone know about it?

You of all people should know the ins and outs of the ol' ML.

I will now Google this Megan's Law.

edit - I see, I will now award 1 internet to Rob. Very well done.

edit2 - I will also award 1 internet to Liam for using the phrase "ins and outs" concerning Megan's Law.

megan must be one of them 'euro' things.

EDIT: did the googles myeslf, and was wrong. I apologize to all 'euro' peoples.

Fail.

EDIT: and I can't believe Ray doesn't know about ML. Shocking lack of research for your desired field.

You study kiddy-bonking at college, right?

Big fail. It's an American law, Nicky. Shame.

edit - I now seas your edit. I take back my statement of shame.

I actually had that innuendo in mind while writing and was debating whether or not to make it more obvious. I'm pleased, overall.

Meh, still think it could've done with some sort of fisting quip, but it's still good on the whole

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Hahahahahahahahhaha. This is why I love you two.

WE SHOULD WRIGHT A MOVEE@

Alright, as long as there's no preachy messages or long dramatic exchanges or any of that shit.

If I ever make a movie, it'll be like if Die Hard was a hardcore porno.

Dude making amatuer movies is the reason I'm subject to Megan's Law in the first place.

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That's super satire.

I don't know who that African fellow is, so I'll just nod and smile.

Damn you Ray.

I believe I can be accused with serious charges of sexual misconduct with minorss.
I believe I can touch the skyy.

Not much room to spread your wings in a 6-by-4 footer, bitch.

OUR MOVIE

Scene: Ext. Day.

(R. Kelly, just standing there. Just standing there.)

THAT'S R. Kelly?

I've heard stories of him, but I never knew what he looked like.

I actually recently was listening to NPR (because I'm a yuppie hipster douchebag) and they were talking about how unlike Michael Jackson and Gerry Glitter, R. Kelly's album sales have been through the roof. Instead of Kelly going into hiding and being ashamed of himself, he's used it as a catylist to sell more albums. Like, "If you think that shit I was doing earlier was dirty, look at how fucking dirty this is."

Like, he doesn't feel guilty for pissing all over 8th graders, he's using it as justification or exemplification of how much of a filthy man he is. And, his album sales are through the roof.

edit - did I mention his album sales are through the roof? Whatever the F that means.

Hunter Pence just hit a grandslam to give the Astros a 4-2 lead Image file not present in the recovered backup

Hey, Matt, tell that Lance Berkman guy to calm the FUCK down.

Also, watch out for my Redlegs, we're making a hell of a comeback here in the month of May/June.

Haha, I will.. He went 0-3 yesterday with 3 strikeouts Image file not present in the recovered backup
And the Reds? Aren't they supposed to be trading JR? That would be retarded..

We want him out of Cincinnati. We'll wait for him to get 600 and then ship him out to Seattle for Ichiro.

Seriously, Griffey has gone completely stagnant. He's gone like 85 at-bats without a homer. We have so many talented young players in the minors right now, we need to make room on our roster. Plus, if we can just get one more solid pitcher from the AL in a trade of Jr, we'll be one of the best teams in the NL.

I'm hoping we can get one of those young guys from Boston, that Lester guy who just threw the No-No maybe. Getting rid of Jr. would clear up like 42 Million in spending. We could so much for that money. Get him out.

Yeah lol. Cinci has some pretty good talent. JR is getting super old, and pretty much useless, but he does draw tons of fans. Did they ever trade Adam Dunn? I always thought he was garbage, and had pretty good trade value.

Everyone always talks about Adam Dunn, but then he goes on tears like he's been on recently. He's hit a homerun in 5 games in a row, has 11 on the year, and 35 RBI. Everyone hates on him because he either K's, BB's or HR's every AB, but his OBP is like .400 or something, so it's impossible not to play a guy like that. Say what you want about his defense, the man is a winning player on offense. He had the game winning RBI in all 3 games against the Indians over the weekend. He's streaky, but when he gets going, he can't be stopped. I'll take him over Jr. any day.