post #1
30 June 2006, 04:09 UTC#1
Aka when you were 5 - 10, post up.
Forum index / General Chat / Stories from elementary school / primary school
Stories from elementary school / primary school
30 posts · page 1 of 1
post #2
30 June 2006, 04:18 UTC#2
Some teachers touched me. I tought it was funny, until the bleeding started.
post #3
30 June 2006, 04:28 UTC#3
In kindergarden me and my best friend got in a fight and I rubbed his pussy little face in the gravel behind the tire swing.. little fag... yeah I used to be a hard ass
post #4
30 June 2006, 06:59 UTC#4
lol one time in grade 4 this really ugly chick called me a gay lord so I whipped an eraser at her face and hit her in the fore head and she claimed it hit her in the eye when there clearly was a big red mark on her for head and to this day she still is a really ugly chick
post #5
30 June 2006, 07:01 UTC#5
This kid called Dean had my mate Billy sleep round his house. In the middle of the night, Dean stuck his mum's tampon up his arse and started wearing her tights with nothing on underneath. No lie.
post #6
30 June 2006, 07:05 UTC#6
ROFL WTF?
post #7
30 June 2006, 08:03 UTC#7
I threw a rock at the fastest kid in the year and hit him in the kneecaps. I resulted in him not being able to participate in sports day. He was devastated.
I called my best mate a cunt and he punched me in the face, dislocating my jaw.
Thats all I remember off the top of my head.
I called my best mate a cunt and he punched me in the face, dislocating my jaw.
Thats all I remember off the top of my head.
post #8
30 June 2006, 08:13 UTC#8
The first time I ever heard the work "paki" without knowing what it meant I went around the playground saying it to everyone. Even the Asian kids.
And I once shoved this kid over backwards, and when he stuck his arm back to break his fall, he broke something else.
There was bone sticking out through his wrist.
And I once shoved this kid over backwards, and when he stuck his arm back to break his fall, he broke something else.
There was bone sticking out through his wrist.
post #9
30 June 2006, 10:57 UTC#9
QUOTE(Rob764 @ Jun 30 2006, 08:01 AM) [snapback]354822[/snapback]
This kid called Dean had my mate Billy sleep round his house. In the middle of the night, Dean stuck his mum's tampon up his arse and started wearing her tights with nothing on underneath. No lie.
Hahahahahahahhaa
Obviously true.
post #10
30 June 2006, 11:11 UTC#10
I can tell you with a billion stories...
my favorite was me gettin suspended for bringing in toe nail clippers...flooding the toilets at a different school trip, few times for runnin away at recess, teacher student arguements and "voulger assult" and so on... I hated elementry
my favorite was me gettin suspended for bringing in toe nail clippers...flooding the toilets at a different school trip, few times for runnin away at recess, teacher student arguements and "voulger assult" and so on... I hated elementry
post #11
30 June 2006, 11:15 UTC#11
haha when I was little this guy who was about 3 years older than I, stole my harmonica so I smashed his head into a brick wall, giving him a concussion. His head started bleeding and he tried running home.
Never came back, I am pretty sure his family moved.
Never came back, I am pretty sure his family moved.
post #12
30 June 2006, 11:17 UTC#12
in grade 5 I was fighting with this kid like 3 times a year
and one time when the fight was getting brutal I spitted on his face like 4 times while hitting him in the jaw and then a teacher came to brake us off and I spitted in her face aswell
I was suspended for two days
haha
great times
and one time when the fight was getting brutal I spitted on his face like 4 times while hitting him in the jaw and then a teacher came to brake us off and I spitted in her face aswell
I was suspended for two days
haha
great times
post #13
30 June 2006, 11:27 UTC#13
Me and a mate had this little "gang" that was all about sexual stuff and if you join you got a free porn mag lol, anyway, this guy wanted to join and as I wasn't 'in charge' my mate had to put him through a test and one of them was to go into the cloak room and show me his arse and dick, anyway he done it, a prefect came along and saw, she laughed at him pulling his pants up, not actually realising what had happened.
Anyway, as he was caught, the 'leader' gave him a 'fail' so he wasn't in and said his punishment was to be jumped on by the 'leaders' sister (who believe me is reeeeeealy fat. lol)
I still get comments now saying about how he showed me his arse and dick but yeh w/e it was like 7 years ago lol
Oh yeah and another thing about this guy is, the porn we gave him anyway, was all fat porn and his mum found it under his matress and told the school, he got in massive trouble and tried to blame me so I made him a certificate saying he was the gayest person ever. lol
He took it as a joke but the head master of the school didn't and neither did his parents, I got in trouble for that too and to this day his parents still don't like me.
1 last thing,
I went to the toilet when I was like 6 and fonud a red crayon on the floor so I wrote, (in the most distinctive handwriting ever lol) "Piss Off!" on the toilet door, later that day I was wondering why we had a spelling test of mostly P, S and F's lol
I got pulled out of assembly the next day and he shouted at me and said he wouldn't tell my parents cos im a good kid. lol
I went home and told my mum because im honest lol, she just said not to do it again and laughed.
There's my stories that I can remember. :-)
Anyway, as he was caught, the 'leader' gave him a 'fail' so he wasn't in and said his punishment was to be jumped on by the 'leaders' sister (who believe me is reeeeeealy fat. lol)
I still get comments now saying about how he showed me his arse and dick but yeh w/e it was like 7 years ago lol
Oh yeah and another thing about this guy is, the porn we gave him anyway, was all fat porn and his mum found it under his matress and told the school, he got in massive trouble and tried to blame me so I made him a certificate saying he was the gayest person ever. lol
He took it as a joke but the head master of the school didn't and neither did his parents, I got in trouble for that too and to this day his parents still don't like me.
1 last thing,
I went to the toilet when I was like 6 and fonud a red crayon on the floor so I wrote, (in the most distinctive handwriting ever lol) "Piss Off!" on the toilet door, later that day I was wondering why we had a spelling test of mostly P, S and F's lol
I got pulled out of assembly the next day and he shouted at me and said he wouldn't tell my parents cos im a good kid. lol
I went home and told my mum because im honest lol, she just said not to do it again and laughed.
There's my stories that I can remember. :-)
post #14
30 June 2006, 11:55 UTC#14
''cloak room and show me his arse and dick'' - gay bastards
post #15
30 June 2006, 12:13 UTC#15
I was about 6 in infant school and all the urinals were being used and I wasnt going to go in the cubical because every one would terrorise you and say you were having a poo and look over and shit lol, so I though fuck it I will use the disabled urinal so I'm standing on my tiptoes pissing in what turned out to be (the drinking fountain) when one of the teachers looks in and see what im doing. she went mental took me staright to the head teacher rang my mom n shit and made me pay for the thing to be sterilized.
post #16
30 June 2006, 13:58 UTC#16
QUOTE(Dan Avery @ Jun 30 2006, 12:55 PM) [snapback]354894[/snapback]
''cloak room and show me his arse and dick'' - gay bastards
lol yeah, wasn't me who said it, I didn't want him to do it but they locked the door and cos he is really gullible and stuff he believes anything u tell him. lol
EDIT:
LOL @ John, didn't u explain what u thought it was n stuff?
post #17
30 June 2006, 14:25 UTC#17
I used to poke a chick in the ass everytime we saw each other, she did it likewise.
post #18
30 June 2006, 15:07 UTC#18
Broke nose when I jumped over this stump thing. In mid air this kid walked infront of me and as I came to land I nutted the back of his head. Me there, nose on other side of my face gushing with blood, he had a little bump and was sobbing like a bitch.
post #19
30 June 2006, 15:10 UTC#19
We had this small stage thing in are classroom were my teacher was setting up the TV for us to wach a video about geography or somthing like that, anyways she took a step back and like rolled her ancle and fucking fell of the stage onto me..so I get crushed by her fatness and my head flys back and cracks a girl in the face and she starts crying her little eyes out.
But yeah..it is a true story.
But yeah..it is a true story.
post #20
30 June 2006, 15:11 UTC#20
Eh, there was this black kid called "Bonghani" in my school. We used to have massive ass fights like one term, and be rolling on the floor kicking the shit outta each other at lunch times, next term we were best fucking mates.
Weird guy he was.
And this time, I was like 6 and took a grape, then squirted the contents of it into some kids eye. He went screaming to the teacher so she called my partents in after school. When my parents were sitting down in her classroom she said "I am very concerned about your Son, he squirted a grape in another pupils eye. Do you know how serious this is?". Needless to say, my parents burst out in uncrontrollable laughter, and were dismissed from the "meeting".
Got a few more, just gotta think of them.
Weird guy he was.
And this time, I was like 6 and took a grape, then squirted the contents of it into some kids eye. He went screaming to the teacher so she called my partents in after school. When my parents were sitting down in her classroom she said "I am very concerned about your Son, he squirted a grape in another pupils eye. Do you know how serious this is?". Needless to say, my parents burst out in uncrontrollable laughter, and were dismissed from the "meeting".
Got a few more, just gotta think of them.
post #21
30 June 2006, 15:22 UTC#21
I remember once, I think I was about 6 or 7, anyways my class was in the libarary and I let off a sbd(silent but deadly) fart. Everyone turns and looks at me, I just pointed to this black kid next named marteeko. Well he gets so pissed off that he grabs a big ass book and knocks the shit out of me. Lets just say from now on I claim my farts.
post #22
30 June 2006, 15:57 UTC#22
grd 1 me n my friend pants sum chick underwear and all and she walked up to the front of the class with no pants on lol
post #23
30 June 2006, 16:06 UTC#23
One time our school did a special festive school lunch for Christmas, like processed turkey and all that shit. Well everything that could have been wrong with the meal was wrong, it was cold, there was no fruit juice, no dessert, there was nowhere to sit so we had to go on the floor...
After lunch the oldest kids started a riot in the playground, screaming that the food was shit and the dinner ladies should be sacked. I think like ten or so kids got suspended for a week and had to each write a formal apology.
After lunch the oldest kids started a riot in the playground, screaming that the food was shit and the dinner ladies should be sacked. I think like ten or so kids got suspended for a week and had to each write a formal apology.
post #24
30 June 2006, 16:17 UTC#24
one time we were chillin on the climbers and I forget what happned but somebody kicked me in the chin and I bit my toung almost off and it was bleeding everywhere, another time a kid called me a name so I punched him in the head alot and broke his helmet into a few pices .. another time this ugly chick spit on me and I chased her with a stick.. and the story got warped to me beating her with a 2x4
post #25
30 June 2006, 16:41 UTC#25
I can't remember anything from then, but I have too many stories from high school. I'll share one or 2.
my favorite one was when me and my best friend andy would set up trash cans against the main stair doors, people open it and get trash all over them. eventually a teacher moved it, we put it back, he came back. mentioned he was checking the cameras, during my 2nd period, he comes in for me. he takes me down this looong hallway into a room with video equipment, and my bestfriend and another dude was there. he showed me the tapes and he was like.. is that you? and I squinted and was like, no way, that kid looks too small. but he was wearing the same shirt I was. haha. eventually we got a warning and the "I'm watching you" speech.
I also found an old journal of mine, and I typed out a letter one of my teachers sent to the disciplinary office to get me kicked out of his class, it reads like so:
my favorite one was when me and my best friend andy would set up trash cans against the main stair doors, people open it and get trash all over them. eventually a teacher moved it, we put it back, he came back. mentioned he was checking the cameras, during my 2nd period, he comes in for me. he takes me down this looong hallway into a room with video equipment, and my bestfriend and another dude was there. he showed me the tapes and he was like.. is that you? and I squinted and was like, no way, that kid looks too small. but he was wearing the same shirt I was. haha. eventually we got a warning and the "I'm watching you" speech.
I also found an old journal of mine, and I typed out a letter one of my teachers sent to the disciplinary office to get me kicked out of his class, it reads like so:
QUOTE
Adam Pendergrass is a constant disruption in class. He is a danger to himself and others in the class. On one occassion on Janurary 21st, Adam took an empty blanket wash bottle and squeezed it into my ear. If there had been any blanket wash chemical in the bottle it could have permanently damaged my ear. I tried to talk to him and reason with him on thinking before he did things like that.
On Feb. 11, Adam placed a carton of paper in front of the darkroom door after a student went into the darkroom. The student was Jamie Hurd. He and two of his friends seem to always want to do things that will get Jamie upset. When you come out of the darkroom, your eyes take a few seconds to readjust to the room light. because of this, Jamie could have fallen over the carton or paper and could have possibly been severely injured.
On Feb. 11, Adam placed a carton of paper in front of the darkroom door after a student went into the darkroom. The student was Jamie Hurd. He and two of his friends seem to always want to do things that will get Jamie upset. When you come out of the darkroom, your eyes take a few seconds to readjust to the room light. because of this, Jamie could have fallen over the carton or paper and could have possibly been severely injured.
post #26
30 June 2006, 16:54 UTC#26
QUOTE(Adem @ Jun 30 2006, 06:41 PM) [snapback]355002[/snapback]
I also found an old journal of mine, and I typed out a letter one of my teachers sent to the disciplinary office to get me kicked out of his class, it reads like so:
QUOTE
Adam Pendergrass is a constant disruption in class. He is a danger to himself and others in the class. On one occassion on Janurary 21st, Adam took an empty blanket wash bottle and squeezed it into my ear. If there had been any blanket wash chemical in the bottle it could have permanently damaged my ear. I tried to talk to him and reason with him on thinking before he did things like that.
On Feb. 11, Adam placed a carton of paper in front of the darkroom door after a student went into the darkroom. The student was Jamie Hurd. He and two of his friends seem to always want to do things that will get Jamie upset. When you come out of the darkroom, your eyes take a few seconds to readjust to the room light. because of this, Jamie could have fallen over the carton or paper and could have possibly been severely injured.
On Feb. 11, Adam placed a carton of paper in front of the darkroom door after a student went into the darkroom. The student was Jamie Hurd. He and two of his friends seem to always want to do things that will get Jamie upset. When you come out of the darkroom, your eyes take a few seconds to readjust to the room light. because of this, Jamie could have fallen over the carton or paper and could have possibly been severely injured.
BWAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!
Did it work?
post #27
30 June 2006, 19:57 UTC#27
Not really my own experiance, but I thought it was kinda relevant anyway.
On Tuesday in English I was speaking to my mate Big Black Sam (henceforth known as BBS), and he started telling me about this kid whose last name was Stonebridge who used to be in his class in primary school and who was kinda autistic and generally fucked in the head. Apparently, this kid was the size BBS is now when he was about 9. BBS is about 6'2" and generally built like a brick shit house, so Stonebridge must have been a fucking beast.
"So we went up to the athletics track on a P.E trip one day, and I was well bored and started distressing Stonebridge. Kept throwing pinecones at his head. He didn't know who it was, so he was getting more and more upset. I finally got a big fat pinecone and caught him square in the side of the face with it. Stonebridge went absolutely mental, started screaming and running around in circles. Because he didn't know who it was, he went after the nearest person, who happened to be one of our teachers, Mr Penn. He launched himself at Mr Penn and knocked him down with a punch to the windpipe. All the other teachers started jumping on Stonebridge, it took about 3 to keep him down on the floor because they were all short n skinny n he was fucking hench. And then our supervising teacher, Mrs Itson, started going "Alright kids, back on the bus now please!" like there was nothing going on, when Stonebridge was writihing around on the floor under 3 teachers. The rest of us were just staring, wide-eyed n cracking up. It was the best day ever."
On Tuesday in English I was speaking to my mate Big Black Sam (henceforth known as BBS), and he started telling me about this kid whose last name was Stonebridge who used to be in his class in primary school and who was kinda autistic and generally fucked in the head. Apparently, this kid was the size BBS is now when he was about 9. BBS is about 6'2" and generally built like a brick shit house, so Stonebridge must have been a fucking beast.
"So we went up to the athletics track on a P.E trip one day, and I was well bored and started distressing Stonebridge. Kept throwing pinecones at his head. He didn't know who it was, so he was getting more and more upset. I finally got a big fat pinecone and caught him square in the side of the face with it. Stonebridge went absolutely mental, started screaming and running around in circles. Because he didn't know who it was, he went after the nearest person, who happened to be one of our teachers, Mr Penn. He launched himself at Mr Penn and knocked him down with a punch to the windpipe. All the other teachers started jumping on Stonebridge, it took about 3 to keep him down on the floor because they were all short n skinny n he was fucking hench. And then our supervising teacher, Mrs Itson, started going "Alright kids, back on the bus now please!" like there was nothing going on, when Stonebridge was writihing around on the floor under 3 teachers. The rest of us were just staring, wide-eyed n cracking up. It was the best day ever."
post #28
01 July 2006, 00:26 UTC#28
haha funny stories...
in fifth grade we had sex ed. so the teacher guy was teaching about personal hygeine and decides to tell a story from supposedly one of his other classes..
he says
"Okay so my students says:"
"(student)teach I only wear three pairs of under wear a week..."
"(teacher) how is that??
"(student) Well, mondays I start with a clean pair... Tuesdays, I flip those inside out.. Wednesdays I get another new pair thursdays flip the inside out I do that same technique for friday and saturday"
"(teacher) Well what about sunday?"
"(student) Well, on sundays we dont go anywhere so I dont wear any...."
The class eruppts laughing and then all of a sudden you can see this kid who looks not very cleanly go "I TOLD YOU NOT TO TELL ANYONE!"
in fifth grade we had sex ed. so the teacher guy was teaching about personal hygeine and decides to tell a story from supposedly one of his other classes..
he says
"Okay so my students says:"
"(student)teach I only wear three pairs of under wear a week..."
"(teacher) how is that??
"(student) Well, mondays I start with a clean pair... Tuesdays, I flip those inside out.. Wednesdays I get another new pair thursdays flip the inside out I do that same technique for friday and saturday"
"(teacher) Well what about sunday?"
"(student) Well, on sundays we dont go anywhere so I dont wear any...."
The class eruppts laughing and then all of a sudden you can see this kid who looks not very cleanly go "I TOLD YOU NOT TO TELL ANYONE!"
post #29
01 July 2006, 00:49 UTC#29
LOL ^^^^
post #30
01 July 2006, 01:14 UTC#30
When I was in 4th grade, this chick Shayda said something about me, and I had just seen The Simpsons for the first time, so I was like "I'll choke her like Homer does to Bart". And I did. I chocked the shit out of her and shook her head back and forth. And I was laughing, cause I didnt think it was hurting her or anything. But like, apparently it did, cause she started coughing and crying and shit.
And then I cried.
OH SHIT. I forgot about the best story ever.
Okay, I may have warped it since it was in second grade and all, but from what I can remember, it was a Girls vs. Boys Lord of the Rings type battle. No joke.
I headed off the boys, and this girl Lauren headed off the girls.
All the boys were standing in a line, and all the girls were opposite us. And when me and Lauren called out, everyone attacked. It was insane. The girls had sticks and shit. It was the coolest thing ever. The teachers broke it up...I think.
Awesome.
And then I cried.
OH SHIT. I forgot about the best story ever.
Okay, I may have warped it since it was in second grade and all, but from what I can remember, it was a Girls vs. Boys Lord of the Rings type battle. No joke.
I headed off the boys, and this girl Lauren headed off the girls.
All the boys were standing in a line, and all the girls were opposite us. And when me and Lauren called out, everyone attacked. It was insane. The girls had sticks and shit. It was the coolest thing ever. The teachers broke it up...I think.
Awesome.