post #1
21 September 2005, 22:22 UTC#1
The heads of the four armed services were sitting around bragging about which group had more guts. They decided to put it to a test.
First they went into the field where Army tank crews were in training. The Army General got on the radio and told one of the Privates to jump under a moving tank. He did and he died. The General said, "Now that guy had guts."
The Air Force General insisted that was nonsense so they went to where pilots were doing bombing target tests. The General got on the radio and directed one of the pilots to crash his plane. He did and he died. The Air Force General said, "Now that guy had guts."
The Marine General claimed that was foolish. So next they all went to a Marine shooting range. He directed one of the Marines to jump in front of one of the targets. He got shot and died. The Marine General said, "Now that guy had guts."
Finally, the Navy Admiral said that they hadn't seen anything yet. They went to a carrier that was in port and a sailor was at the top of the mast working on the radar systems. The Admiral shouted up for the sailor to jump.
Shocked the sailor said, "What!"
The Admiral repeated himself.
Flipping the bird, the sailor shouted back, "F*CK YOU!"
"See. Now THAT guy has guts!" replied the smug Admiral.
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A Soldier, a Sailor, an Airman and a Marine got into
an argument about which branch of the service was "The
Best." The arguing became so heated the four
servicemen failed to see an oncoming truck. They were
run over and killed instantly. Soon, the four
servicemen found themselves at the Pearly gates of
Heaven. There, they met Saint Peter and decided that
only he could be the ultimate source of truth and
honesty. So, the four servicemen asked him, "Saint
Peter, which branch of the United States Armed Forces
is the best?" Saint Peter replied, "I can't answer
that. However, I will ask God what He thinks the next
time I see Him. Meanwhile, thank you for your service
on earth and welcome to Heaven." Some time later the
four servicemen see Saint Peter and remind him of the
question they had asked when first entering Heaven.
The four servicemen asked Saint Peter if he was able
to find the answer. Suddenly, a sparkling white dove
lands on Saint Peter's shoulder. In the dove's beak is
a note glistening with gold dust. Saint Peter opens
the note... trumpets blare, gold dust drifts into the
air, harps play crescendos and Saint Peter begins to
read the note aloud to the four servicemen:
MEMORANDUM FROM THE DESK OF THE ALMIGHTY ONE: TO: All
Former Soldiers, Sailors, Airmen, and Marines SUBJECT:
Which Military Service Is the Best
1. All branches of the United States Armed Forces are
honorable and noble.
2. Each serves America well and with distinction.
3. Being a serviceman in the United States military
represents a great honor warranting special respect,
tribute, and dedication from your fellow man.
4. Always be proud of that.
Sincerely,
GOD, USMC (Ret)